Author: Allison DuBois (Page 43 of 53)

I wanted to record a podcast that answers the hard questions. What happens when people commit suicide? Do they go to hell? What are the church’s views on the souls of people who commit suicide and mediums in general? For the answer to those questions, I could think of no better answers than the ones found in Chapter 7 of my book We Are Their Heaven. While thinking about other topics that often impact our lives as others celebrate the happy holidays throughout the year, I felt I should also talk about DYING. For the most carefully thought out words I could think of on dying, I refer to chapter 7 “I’m Dying” out of my book, Love Can’t Tell Time. Carve out a quiet moment for yourselves, sit back and ponder what I’m saying, as I read to you from 2 of my favorite books.
During this sentimental time of year as we make new memories and revel in some old ones, take the time to feel grateful for the connections you have with the people closest to you. Taking the time to let your loved ones know how special they are to you and setting aside time to spend with them will leave you with very few, if any, regrets in life. Knowing that we matter to our closest friends and family and showing them we value having them in our lives is the sweetest part of being alive. I hope your holidays were merry, have a Happy New Year. I’m Allison DuBois, thank you for tuning in to The Dead Life podcast, to all of my believers out there, Don’t stop believing!

– Allison DuBois

If you like the sections of the books I read from in this episode, be sure to buy the book to read the full story. They are available through my website in paperback, ebook and audio book.

This time of year, revolves around family and friends! The older we get, the more empty chairs we have around the table. We can’t live forever, our bodies have expiration dates but we can enjoy the ride, while honoring our loved ones who are here in spirit. As you decorate your tree or light the Menorah, it’s healthy to savor the moment, while remembering holidays from the past. Every day of the year will be someone’s birthdate and someone’s death date, that can’t be avoided but whether it’s a happy day or sad day, we’re all visited by emotions from the past. Making children happy and giving them the gift of security and warmth seems to be the cornerstone of life because we are all shaped by our childhood, we learn and grow from it. When I bring through the dead, they talk about their childhood and for those who had a beautiful one, they gush over their many fond memories with their parents, how they felt loved and special. For those who didn’t have great parents or any at all, they often become the parent they wished they had, healing themselves in turn. After they die they often say in readings, “My mom (or dad) and I made amends, they see the rippling affects of their actions and asked for my forgiveness”. Talking about making amends after death seems important to the deceased, many become whole for the first time in their existence through forgiveness. Adulthood is great but childhood seems to be the magical stardust in our souls, interwoven moments of new discoveries, first times and creating memories with our family and friends through Summer cookouts, Halloween parties, Christmas cookie exchanges, after school playdates with the neighborhood kids, millions of moments that add up to the nexus of who you are. The people who were present in your childhood have a great impact on who you are, so when they die, you feel as though part of your childhood died. The holidays revolve around children for the most part, making that time of year extremely emotional and sentimental for us all. The holidays are reminiscent of grandma’s laugh, Uncle Joe’s funny mustache, mom’s special touches, dad dressing up like Santa or giving your mom a big kiss after one too many cups of holiday cheer! The invaluable memories of playing with your brother and sister and all your new toys, falling asleep by the fireplace as the firelight warms your face, all wrapped up in your favorite blanket and believing that all things are possible. If during the holidays you’re missing someone close to your heart, know they’re missing you too. The dead tell me in readings “Heaven’s not complete, until you’re there” just as you can’t be 100% content without them here, still making memories with you. So, the only way to satisfy both the grieving living and the grieving dead, is for you to acknowledge each other as still being part of each other’s world. Show home movies, laugh with your kids or friends over photo albums as you remember the joy brought into your life by the one you hold in your heavy heart. They love it when we talk about them and pour over their pictures, they love it when we share their special signature dish with others so they can listen to the compliments fly, they’re touched when you raise a glass in their honor at your family dinner, while they’re standing beside you beaming with their hand on your shoulder, taking in the love. The more you include them in your family traditions, the stronger your connection to them will get, making communication more frequent. Once, you’re seeing their signs and starting to experience their presence, take it to the next level, tell them they’re still part of the family and you want them in your daily life, then ask them “for a visit”. Establishing a relationship after someone dies is as important as being there for them in life.

I’m often asked, “How do you know the difference between a dream and a ‘visit’?”. Obviously, a ‘visit’ will always involve a deceased loved one making an appearance. A dream usually doesn’t include the deceased, especially not in an emotional way. We all have characteristics in our personalities that tie into our dreams at night, to work out our angst. For instance, I have always had a “savior” complex, I’ve had the same dream throughout the years since I was 7-years old. In the dream I’m flying trying to catch a vampire like bad guy who can fly faster than me, he has a victim tucked under his arm and I can’t fly fast enough to keep up with him, right when I catch up to him to save the victim, he kills them and I wake-up. I’ve had both, intense dreams and visits, I do know the difference, let me explain. In a ‘visit’ when you see a loved one who’s passed away, sometimes they talk, sometimes they don’t, sometimes they smile, other times they frown but the common thread to an actual visit is did your soul recognize their soul? Did every fiber of your being sense their actual presence? With a bonafide visit from a spirit you’ll often wake-up and have the sensation that they were just there, as if you could have pulled them out of your dream and into reality.

The dead try and convey various messages to us through our dreams because when you’re asleep, accessing you is far easier for them because your not distracted by life itself. When your house is buzzing with children, barking dogs, ringing phones and work, you’re too distracted for them to convey messages to you. When you’re asleep, it’s much easier for them to communicate with you but they still have to battle your mind that’s working out your fears and your day’s problems. The more soundly you sleep the clearer the message will be. You know you had a visit, when you wake-up and you’re mad that you woke-up because you wanted to stay with them or you heard their message so clearly it was as if you were awake talking to them. Your soul will tell you if it was a “visit”, there’s a sense of ‘knowing’ on a soul level in your center, it was them, your soul will feel lighter after your reconnection. Some people will still feel the kiss on their lips given to them by their deceased spouse right before they woke-up, or the sensation that their mother’s arms had been wrapped around them like when they were a small child. There are feelings unique to you and your loved ones that tells you they were just there. When you’ve had a ‘visit’ from a loved one, you don’t have to ask if it was real, you just smile because you know deep in your soul that it was.

Don’t stop believing!

-Allison DuBois